Do you ever wish you could respond to certain events in the same cool, confident way your colleague does?
You’ve seen it right?
Someone is rude at a meeting. One person stands up to them and calls them out while someone else is retreating and going quiet.
Or someone makes a mistake, they shrug it off and get onto fixing it. Meanwhile someone else makes the same mistake, beats themselves up and ends up an emotional wreck.
What about when someone’s asked to speak at a public event? One person will jump at the chance excited at the prospect while another will find any excuse to get out of it.
Hmmmm….want to know why?
It all comes down to what we believe and how we FEEL as a result of that experience.
We can believe we’re a terrible public speaker but feel energised at the opportunity to practice and get better.
We can believe making a mistake is a personal reflection on our ability as a leader and feel guilty for getting it wrong.
We can also witness someone being rude, believe it’s not acceptable but be fearful of the consequences if we stand up and say anything.
And, of course the opposite can be true too.
These experiences create a visceral response in our bodies. So, when we want to make a change and do things differently, we must address more than just our thoughts and beliefs. We have to dig deeper into the meaning we have associated with them and subsequently the way they make us feel.
This is why mindset and talk coaching in not enough for personal change and transformation. If you really want more confidence to call out bad behaviour, recover from a mistake or agree to a public speaking gig then you need tap into the rational mind, the subconscious mind and the body. Afterall, they work seamlessly together.
But, don’t take my word for it, give it a go!
Here’s a simple technique you can try next time you’re left scratching your head, wondering why you responded the way you did:
Close your eyes.
Name the feeling that comes up for you (guilt, shame, disappointment etc)
Locate where you feel it in your body.
Imagine it as a “thing” – what form does it take, what colour is it, what texture?
Put your hand on it and take in three deep relaxing breaths (in through the nose and out through the mouth).
Now ask it – what do you want me to know? Have a conversation.
Thank it for keeping you safe and release it. You can release it by breathing white light into it and letting it dissolve, or you could energetically pull it out of your body and release it.
When you’re ready, open your eyes and notice how you feel now.
If you’re up for it, do some journaling on what came up for you to uncover the underlying beliefs and stories it represented to you and what new feelings you can now attach to it.
Give it a try and let me know how it worked for in the comments.
PS My prices are going up 1 August 2023. If you want to secure a coaching package at my current process, email me and let’s chat about which one is right for you. I use a powerful blend of embodiment practices, hypnotherapy and coaching so my clients can gain the clarity and confidence they need to make the next move that’s right for them. I help them unlock their magic to make the difference they desire and be valued for their expertise (without having to play politics or sacrifice the moments that matter!).